A Little Levity: What do they Really Talk About in Meetings?
Minutes 2 Midnight generally deals with fairly heavy fare, so it makes sense to carve out a little corner where lighter meals are served. This is the first entry of an ongoing "just for fun" section where you'll find some fun stuff to explore (well...I think it's fun, anway). Check out the "Just For Fun" links at the top of the sidebar for more.
If you're employed in Corporate America, you've probably been forced to attend the odd meeting from time to time. Ever find yourself sitting in your chair - fuming because you have a wad of work to do but you're stuck in a "productivity" meeting? Ever find yourself in a room with too many people and too few ideas? Too many ideas? Ever just want to scream maniacally when good ideas are unceremoniously flushed down the commode? (Southern for "toilet"). Then you might want to read on. Below, I've compiled a list of real quotes from my co-workers - uttered at various and sundry times during various and sundry meeting marathons. We might be talking about talking engineers, here, but somehow I suspect that meeting migraines are universal - no matter who's attending, and no matter what they're talking about.
Stated 1 hour and 5 minutes into a meeting:
"What should we be doing in this meeting?"
Stated in reference to someone who was on maternity leave:
"You realize we'll be doing these same tasks when she gets back, so we might as well assign her something now."
Stated during one particularly boring meeting:
Boss: "How do we make these meetings more fun?"
Engineer: "Large quantities of beer would be nice."
An unfortunate slip of the tongue:
Engineer: "We need to avoid the problem of isolating knowledge to one person and then that one person leaves."
Boss: "We've solved that problem on [our project]. No one person knows anything."
Stated during a late-night marathon meeting:
"Nothing I do on this project is not frustrating."
Said during a meeting that 2 groups were supposed to attend:
"The meeting would be more useful if they showed up."
A little diversionary conversation during a long weekend meeting:
Engineer 1: "There's something leaking in the women's bathroom. It sounds like someone's taking a shower."
Engineer 2: "They're probably just trying to keep the rats from getting thirsty."
Said during one meeting where a conflict needed to be resolved:
"If they can't resolve it, I've got ski masks and baseball bats in the car."
...More coming later!